“You think you kno me, but you have no idea.”
November 2008
December 2008
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March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
February 2010
March 2010
April 2010
May 2010
June 2010
July 2010
August 2010
September 2010
October 2010
November 2010
December 2010
January 2011
February 2011
March 2011
April 2011
Monday, April 18, 2011 || 8:03 AM
To be honest,
I'm very tired.
I can feel myself slowing down. I'm not sure how to get that fire back. I'm feeling unmotivated. I'm stressed. I feel sort of down too.
I just want to go to bed and curl in a ball...and not get up for a very long time.
But I can't.
warning
Friday, April 8, 2011 || 5:36 AM
Truth is, I get jealous easily because what's mine is mine. I'm stubborn as hell, I apologize only when I feel like it. I will push you beyond words when I'm unhappy with you. I will probably make you cry. I act like I don't give a fuck because I care too much. I over analyze the smallest of things & probably come off as a bitch to simply guard myself. So if you really wanna fall in love with me,
I suggest you think again.
I never wanted to
Thursday, March 31, 2011 || 8:38 PM
"cherishing is for cherries. we can't cherish when there is no cherry on top of the cake!"
me: Don't waste your time on me. I don't want you to.
you: I've made up my mind too... I'll be waiting for you till you come home. I don't care if you want me or not. And I'm not wasting my time.
You told me again and again that you're gonna wait for me. But the problem is, you don't kno how long it takes and I don't kno how long it would actually take to heal an alien heart, one like mine.
So forgive me for saying goodbye for I am a really difficult child.
365.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011 || 4:09 AM
In life, you're going to come across people who will say all the right things at all the right times.
And somewhere along the year, you surprise yourself.
Happy anniversary sweetheart.
PS: Your drawing is as good as a small kid's. =p
Stranger.
Monday, March 7, 2011 || 9:46 AM
Because the more you change,
the more I feel that I don't kno you anymore,
Considering the fact that I knew you for ages,
it's really sad, very sad.
oh hello baby
Wednesday, March 2, 2011 || 5:14 AM
In Digital Illustrator class just now......
Lecturer: is this the singer who sang "just the way you are"?
Me: err yeaaa
Lecturer: ohh no wonder he looks familiar.
Me: You've probably seen him fetching me home from here before.
Lecturer: *laughs* well keep it up. From my table, i thought it was a real photograph.
Crazy.
But I'm happy. :)
11 days later
Tuesday, March 1, 2011 || 6:22 AM
It was the 19th of February, probably hours after I officially turned 2-0. The night before, I gave the ones I was close to a really difficult time, maybe because I was expecting something, something to spark off my special day. But I sat at home all day, minding my own business and the only person that responded to my calls, were nacho and adik(my cats). I even thought it was my worst birthday ever. Because everybody was too busy for me. Time and time again, you tried to calm me down but I was too blinded by emotions that I didn't care about how you felt when I was throwing them at you. You just took it all in and said, "I'll make it up to you tomorrow."
So when that afternoon came, I arrived in a dress my younger sister bought for my birthday. Little did I kno that my bestfriends were already anxiously waiting to surprise me. And you guys got me alright. It was so good to see how you guys managed to put everything behind and planned that day for me. Although it was nothing much, but I appreciated it, every single bit of it. With all of my heart, I do.
This month, marks a year of being together with you, I am sincerely sorry to say, that's 10 months more than how long I had predicted it to be. It has been scary. I realized my fears, what has been stopping me back and what has keep me going. I realized how easily I wanted to give up on us, because I grew up believing in one thing that stays very close to me, karma. And my weak heart cried to give up and let it go. But how you struggled through everything just to make me fight on and stay, what you spoke about word to word, your every tear, is what that has kept me going.
So as of now, I would want to forget about the little big things we fought about, the little big things we were upset about, the little big things I may have cried for, the tiniest huge things I whined about. For everyday, is a new day.
Don't let me down.
Once upon a sick, stubborn boy.
Thursday, February 3, 2011 || 10:58 PM
Disgusting.
"Tadi biler webcam, I felt like youre beside me. I guess i miss you sooo much. " - Aizat.
aww :)
Dear Abah.
Tuesday, January 18, 2011 || 7:14 AM
"Today 48 yrs ago i was born. Reflecting on my life. I have done nothing good at all, with exception having my babies. Today I celebrate my girls. May Allah give you all happiness, care, health and wealth cos I cannot give you all luv you all." - Dad.
& I kno there's sunshine beyond that rain,
I kno there's good times beyond that pain,
so I close my eyes and I pray.
Happy Birthday, dad.
Kno Your Worth.
Saturday, January 1, 2011 || 10:48 PM
It's over. Goodbye 2010. Hello 2011.
2011 shall be a year of change and hard work.
I shall work hard for my school no matter how much I may detest the modules.
Starting 2011, I shall go with the flow.
I shall not have anymore expectations just so I will avoid getting disappointed.
I'm not even gonna get mad anymore. I'm just going to learn to expect the lowest out of the people I thought the highest of. I'm gonna change and vow to treat each and everyone of them the way they treat me.
These teenage years only last so long. I kno I'm going to live for a little while and then I will die. I might as well make the best of it while I can. It is my life afterall.
2010 has taught me a hell of a good lesson.
Sometimes, to keep it together, you have to let it go.
Goodbye 2010. I hope 2011 will be better. Thanks for the memories though.
